Paint Job Anyone?

I had heard the rumors, but I didn't believe them to be true until now.
You see, my office has two enormous windows leading out into the showroom of the dealership. As I was sitting here working this morning, this is what took place:

A very large man entered the show room. I smiled in the friendly manner I always do when a customer enters the building.
I saw a quick movement to my left and looked up to see Talky Pete RUSHING around his office with a terrified look on his face.
As the large man went over to the Service and Parts window, Talky taped a sign to the men's room door. I leaned forward to see what it said: SORRY, OUT OF ORDER.
Then I began this conversation with Talky:

What in hell are you doing? That bathroom isn't out of order.

Yes it IS!

No it's not.

STOP IT!! That's the GUY! The one who ALWAYS uses our bathroom and sprays crap everywhere!

Come on, you're exaggerating.

NO I'M NOT! HE CRAPS ALL OVER THE TOILET AND THE WALL AND THEN I HAVE TO CLEAN IT UP!

The wall? Really?

Then my husband pops around the corner: YES, GERTIE, THE WALL!

Which is when I said: YOU TAKE THAT SIGN DOWN RIGHT NOW BEFORE HE GOES IN THE WOMEN'S BATHROOM!

My husband had told me about this guy. About how every single time he comes in for an oil change, he uses the bathroom and every single time he uses the bathroom, he sort of explodes in there. I figured he was just being ridiculous. After seeing the general reaction this guy garnered upon entering the dealership, I decided maybe it wasn't just sillyness after all.

The man is sitting in the waiting area now. So help me, if he squirts up the women's restroom, I am NOT cleaning it. NEVAH NEVAH NEVAH!!!